She's like a coupon for free blow jobs. No purchase necessary.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I knew it was time to leave Waffle House when you started singing "What's Your Fantasy" to your hash browns.
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The world isn't going to end because you slept with him!
... that would be easier though.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
You should really trust me on this one. "hit it and quit it" might not be the best career move on your part...
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
I'm in the liquor store and fucking "Wannabe" by the Spice Girls is playing. IM ALREADY ASHAMED OF MY REASON FOR BEING HERE, GIVE ME A BREAK.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
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