Get your hand out of your ass!
how did you know my hand was in my ass? Guess where my other hand is..?
In your belly button
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
totally watching dr. phil and getting eaten out right now. be jealous.
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
Any man who has a face like that and a bike, deserves a vagina like yours permanently.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Why do you think she gets more guys?
well her prof pic is her in her bedroom looking hot and mine is me looking terrified while holding a giant spider at 6 flags, so there's that
Let me rub your butt and eat French fries from your mouth and dip them in your ketchup filled belly button.
I'm sure the lady doing my pedicure could smell the sex on me.
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