so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
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I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
Congrats on graduating and I'm in a cab and need someone to helps keeping me up, do you mind
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
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WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
The single life is the freaking dream dude. I'm sitting here naked, eating chocolate mousse, and watching Gilmore girls. It's wonderful
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
He put a doughnut around his dick and I ate it. What can I say. It was a good fucking night.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
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