guess who just trotted in eating her oats and wagging her penis
Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
Apparently he's into classy girls that wear sweaters and don't throw up on him when they go out.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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