remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
I was just walking through Burbank and saw a hobo using solar panels on his shopping cart. We must be in trouble if the hobos are researching alternative sources of fuel...
You never realize just how much you have to be thankful for until you almost shit yourself in a Target.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
we ended up on her 9 year old brothers bed and he saw the whole thing.... now he will know how to use his equipment
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
So, then you thought it was a good idea to dress up like the Hamburglar, buy a bag full of McDonalds hamburgers, go to Burger King and throw them at everyone while screaming "HAMBURGLAR!". At that point there was no stopping you.
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
Randomize