it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
I drove your lawn mower home. Hope you don't need it tonight. I'll bring it over tomorrow.
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Yeah, he hid all the toilet paper and took a video of me looking for it before I shit my pants. Definitely playing that clip at our wedding.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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