Dude, way to rack up $80 in pornos in the hotel room last night, and not tell me before I got blindsided at check out.
Heh. Guess I ordered some porno last night. Heh.
It's just like the Real World with babies
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
He tried to bang a 300 pounder last night. No joke. I shotgunned a tall boy in a bar cuz the bartender didn't crack the beer. Cant wait till Nashville.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
Very impressive. My GPA is the same amount of orgasms I can offer tonight (valid only tonight): 3.5
Might I also add after my boss threw up in the garbage can and yelled puking rally, he dougied, then told me I wasn't about that life.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
Jesus I should have learned from my first marriage not to get married again
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
