"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
watching "look who's talking now." getting choked up at the end when they find each other at the cabin
doesn't that movie star kirstie alley and have talking dogs in it? new low...even for you
You sprayed lysol all over me. You said that my soberness was infecting your night.
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
if youre gonna throw up it might as well taste like christmas :S
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
So basically he is jobless, a potential serial killer, and has poor taste in music? We simply don't have time for that.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
The man at the checkout said "Somebody's not fucking around".
It's gonna be a good night
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
Randomize
