I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
That weatherman I hooked up with is on TV again
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
My chemistry professor just asked me if I ever found a ride home from the bar last Saturday
There r osticjed everywhere
The last thing I remember is stabbing him with his diabetes medicine
She's echoing.. Her head must be in the toilet..
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
he can get married early and ruin his life but he sure as hell isn't ruining mine with a shitty bachelor party
Got myself invited to boss's family dinner party, drank too much, and fucked boss's brother in his parent's house. Just another Wednesday.
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
