I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
i wish i could swallow nair and shit it out and it would get rid of all my ass hair.
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
He could have been a one armed faceless howler monkey. I was so slammered that I didn't care what I was having sex with or if whatever it was... was doing it right.
Seriously, it sounds like someone is torturing a dozen cats inside a Japanese techno club while a jamaican yells random hipster words through a megaphone.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
Randomize
