Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
Are you with Adam and his vodka?
Yeswdsssss I masde his pickle gi away ans he go anbnoued
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
I swear after i took it all i did was scream for four hours
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
She is either doing really drawn out crunches or trying to sniff her boobs...She's lying on her back with her hand behind her head, forcing her head into the cleavage that's ok to expose and then moves her head back and then does it again.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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