Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
shes trying to light up her bowl in front of the fan. everytime it blows it out she just gives it a dirty look.
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Careful when you walk in I'm laying by the door.
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
It's time to run my sex life like a basketball team. Got the lesson Clint!
Saw the same Luigi I hooked up with last Halloween. Still in his same Luigi costume and scruff that hurt my face
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
I'm gonna fight the coyote
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
At a bar in the city and the whole place starting singing “Happy Birthday” to someone. Everyone but me. The person next to me leaned over and said, “Why didn’t you sing along?!?” I responded, “I don’t know him. I don’t give a shit if he has a happy birthday.”
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