And then I said "flip over. I want to show you something i learned in Afghanistan."
I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
so after morning sex, she rolled a joint and turned on sports center
you might have found the rare bro goddess. i thought they were myth
if pee wee herman would have taken a snuggie to the movies he wouldnt have gotten caught
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just stole some rubbers from the girl I stayed with last night so I can use them on a different girl today..
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Disregard everything I texted you last night. Oh, and disregard me hooking up with your boyfriend.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize