i walked toward the cop car thinking it was the liquor store lights nd by that time it was too late to escape the trap
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
You insisted that your middle name was "velociraptor" for 20 minutes and every time someone said something you tried to relate it to velociraptors. That kind of drunk.
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
he threw an umbrella that he ripped out of the table at the fence like he was harpooning a whale while the owner of the bar was outside then tried to blame it on an old man...
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
Last night we proved the theory that "harder" is the worst rough sex safe-word ever.
We should write a country song: “Blacked Out on a Sunday”
Randomize