so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
My vagina is scared and excited at the same time. It might not be able to sleep tonight.
I just found 17 dollars of saltine crackers in my room. confused incredibly. suprised not at all.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
She's an honest to god fucking ballerina. She did things I don't have names for.
Haha, oh man. I'm awake now. Slept in my headdress.
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
What was the point of renting a $600 trolley if no one even remembers going to the first bar?
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
people keep driving by and judging me for drinking natty outside in my underwear at 9 am. rude.
Randomize
