Hey man sorry I got all grabby
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
This show inspires me to have sex in space
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
I have major gossip for you.
Oh no, did you have sex last night?
If I had sex last night I'd probably post it on facebook. It's been that long and I'd be that excited.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
at one point, i told him to buy you a pumpkin spice latte and uggs because you're a common white girl and that's how he should get you in bed
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
Did you happen to find my bra? I'm pretty sure I still had it on before we left that bar
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Randomize
