Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
Just walked by a guy on campus YELLING 'Im still hammered'
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
This is no lauging matter. Huge cock equals great sex. Marriage to huge cock equals great life.
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
its like i had a thought but i dont know what the words are for it
He unbuckled his belt, tipped his hat at me, then told me to "saddle up"
this is like your 5th cowboy right? where do you keep finding these guys?!!
There is a video on my phone of me suckling a bag of wine from your crotch area while you say "The Body of Christ" in a Michigan accent. I vaguely remember being offended by this yet I did it anyway.
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Freshly fucked must agree with my hair cause I've gotten compliments on it this afternoon
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
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