if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
and this is why we should make december sharting awareness month.
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
You said you didn't want to drink anymore so you started shooting vodka down the back of your throat using a syringe. Oh, and then you aimed it at my eye ball...vodka in the eye hurts btw.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
I woke up with my shoes on but pants in the fish tank
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