i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
Why did you video tape me drying my boxers in the microwave?
He won't ever take me seriously if I keep getting drunk and hooking up with all his friends.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
You should make a checklist to ensure they are quality material. Here's mine: wearing shoes, not drunk, very hot, has teeth, speaks english. You never know
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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