We're facebook friends in real life
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
I understand Curling. That high.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
The only people allowed to make me cry are myself and Chris Hemsworth as Thor. And me.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
Randomize
