this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
Be here at 9 and look fabulous. We have drag queens to impress.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You've created a tinder dominating monster.
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
i'm currently watching a guy eat a bunch of cacti and i have lost all faith in humanity
**cactuseses
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