R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
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i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
Dude it was a mini horse. It obviously only eats mini things.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
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Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
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