Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Topless wife handwashing shirt. Tonight marriage is good.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
It went from cuddling and watching blood diamond to watching the three of them snort an entire $80 bag of blow off the coffee table
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
antibiotics and champagne: breakfast of champions
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
I'm having to shit out rocks
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
Randomize
