He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
She offered to massage my back by hitting it with a sparkly purple double dildo... Bi chicks can get creepy
I think I just used lyrics from the Sister Sister theme song to let a guy down easy...
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
So I was putting on a condom and looked to my right to not make eye contact, she said did you just look at the American flag while putting that on. I said this one's for Team USA.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Come share oat with me in your robe
ITS THE FIRST FRIDAY NIGJT AFTER MOVING IN WITH THE NEW ROOMIE AND I ACTUALLY JIST RIPPED MY TAMPON OUT AND THREW IT IN THE NEIGHBORS YARD WERE GOINF ON THE BOAT AND SLEPEING IN HIS AMBULANCE GOODNIGHT
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
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