This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
It was worth having to clean the cum stains out of the carpet.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
I love standing in line at rite aid for 10 minutes being forced to talk to my ex's mom about life while I'm holding nothing but yeast infection cream
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
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