I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Sockward: that moment during sexytimes when you realize your socks are still on and you have no idea how to remove them in a non-awkward fashion.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I've just been thinking about sangria a lot lately, like an adult.
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
