I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
Dude she hit me with my own penis and it hurt. I've never been cock slapped but she slapped me with my own cock so it has to be worse.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Word my sister pulled through for me and brought vodka shooters for the plane. its about to be a sloppy 4 hours
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I know her cup size but not her name....
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