Haha so apparently that girl last thought I was you the whole time, and in the morning realized you weren't the one she fucked. Thanks for your help.
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
we left the music on while we were fucking. some kanye west song started playing and he started to cry
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
My face is going numb. I think it's time I call it quits
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
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