# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Where is the hickey?
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
How much would it be to rent out Gus Johnson so he can announce our flip cup games?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
It's like weed even makes my glasses better. Everything is so bright and clear and beautiful!
I wanna send them a card but I don't think hallmark makes a "sorry your fiance and another girl blew me at the same time in a frat house but congrats!" card
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
