So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I don't really know how to say this, but I have an oven mitt to return to you tomorrow..
My mom just invited me to come with them on their honeymoon to Mexico this summer. And I got a Bump-It in my stocking.
Pass the awkward sauce please.
I'm drowning in it here
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
