U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
mrs. f**** your sons in jail, if you can help with bail please respond, if not please dont tell him i told you.
Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
The gay bar tender told me I looked like Prince William. And that I needed my balls licked.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I woke up because a stranger was shoving an already lit bowl into my mouth. Spring break is awesome
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
When i like your selfie it means one of two things. 1. thats a nice photo, friend. OR 2. I wanna bend you over a table. But youll never know.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
please come here right now, that girl who always gets her boob out is here and she brought taco bell
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
Randomize
