he's the Salvador Dali of pubic shaving
goodnight i made you a song goodbye
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
I had a drunk dream I lived on a puppy farm. I hope this dream repeats every night of my life.
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
Looking forward to meeting the person naked and passed out at my kitchen table.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
