Let's go to weight watchers and eat in front of them.
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
he fell down during beer pong and the chick told him to rub the sand out of his pussy and suck it up. i am in love
Can we please get on skype for like 20 seconds so i can show you my penis and the spiderman temporary tattoo that is right above it
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He was the perfect gentleman on our first date. Took me out for candlelit dinner at a fancy restaurant, held open the door, walked me home, and made me cum three times before he got his.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
DO NOT FUCK YOUR ENGAGED GAY NEIGHBOR!
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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