I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i'm pretty sure the only people calling it "sexting" are ones who don't actually do it
We are lost. Everyone is drunk and it all went downhill after we iced the bus driver.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
I'm thinking he has to buy me dinner at least twice before i even start considering casting him for "Fuck buddy - understudy."
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
Randomize
