i just used a pokemon card to do blow. i need an adult. now.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
Just found an "inspected with pride" sticker on or around my vagina
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoops. I'm a horrible gf, I dropped the "I'm looking for jobs in a different city" bomb before I wished him a happy anniversary
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
We took a walk on the beach after the bar, he held my hand and kissed me. And then I peed under a lifeguard stand. It was so romantic.
i was making a gravity bong in my room and my dad walked in. he helped me finish. i love being home for the holidays.
WTF ARE YOU DOING IT'S FUCKING VEGAN COFFEE IT'S MADE WITH NUT MILK YOU'RE NOT A FUCKING SQUIRREL.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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