Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
never. drinking. again.
lets not get ahead of ourselves.
Got 6 blowjobs in one weekend... new personal best.
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
Randomize
