just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
He told me about his girlfriends trust issues during our post sex spooning
Can we put this graduation on the shelf figuratively and go drink
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
Go to the bar. Find a girl. Ask if she can cook. Tell her you have a guitar at home. Ask her if she wants to see it. Bring her home. Sleep with her. Tell her it's your birthday in the morning. Enjoy your made with lust breakfast.
It's a sad night when one of your friend texts you that she's going on a date with someone you know and then invites you to maybe have a drink after
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
Randomize
