I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am literally hand feeding my crying ex boyfriend taco bell. What has my life become?
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
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