I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
You just took 4 shots. 2 of them were maple syrup.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I cut my penus on the lid.
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I want him to be the Hulk to my Brooke Hogan this Halloween. Can I ask him to be my daddy this weekend?
Only if you say it like that.
The police woke me up so they had no choice but to see my morning wood.
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
Randomize
