Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
25 People Didn’t Realize They Were Talking To Someone Famous
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
I WANT TO. I JUST IMAGINE HIS BEAUTIFUL BLONDE HEAD INBETWEEN MY LEGS AND I BREAK DOWN AND START CRYING.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Guys, as my favorite vagina consultants I have to share something.
My professional advice is not to put lemons in your lady pocket.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
You have no concept of how high I am, do you?