"you've got the devil in yuh. the curse of Jesus is coming on your sex soon." That's what a homeless guy just told me.
I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
I just want one of her status not to be about Jesus.
My friend just ordered a beer and poured it on the floor in celebration of open bar night
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
first thing my tuition money buys is a strap on
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
I find nice boys who are in extremely long term relationships with nice girls, wait for them to break up, and sneak in for the rebound fucking.
You are like a terrifying jaguar of sex. Predatory.
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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