Midnight walks are trippy
I tried to do that earlier, but I was alone and scared, so I stole a happy Birthday balloon.
Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
I think I just wanna go buy some jack at the liquor store, come home, take my pants off, and not give a shit about stuff
I said his dick tasted like a Hawaiian Sweet Roll. And then I yelled MAHALO.
We were like ok let's be eachothers maid of honor and then you were like "ok see you at the wedding" and walked away
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
He told me he was gonna go wash a trailer and somehow I ended up eating vodka fruit with children in a green bean field.
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
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