Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
I really wanna talk..
if by talk you mean have nasty makeup sex involving marshmellow fluff.. I'm down
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I am particularly sorry about getting dome in your backseat. And for thinking you wouldn't notice.
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
The couple that wants to take me home just paid the bartender $100 to pour tequila down my throat. I think I'm in some type of twilight zone where stds run rampant and the alcohol floweth
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Guess what I signed up for?!?!?!
Please tell me you're not selling your eggs.
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
