Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
Some guy just delivered flowers to my roommate cause he fell off a roof onto her at a party last night. I think they have a date tomorrow.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
I just want a whole pitcher of margarita and a headdress from party city and sit around and look like a fucking indian princess.
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
debating what would be more effort, turning on to my other side or trying to get myself off with my left hand. that kind of lazy day.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Remember that time I came to London for 4 hours, got hammered, cried for an hour and then left.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
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