i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
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