What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
i'm as serious about my hair as jesse from full house.
that is uncle jesse to you, show some respect.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
Highlight of my weekend: having my card suspended due to "suspicious charges" and standing in line at the gas station yelling at customer service on the phone that I really did go to 4 different strip clubs in one night
She danced with a broom while telling me I was "cool as shit" and she "wishes she could take a portion of my big ass and attach it to hers" then she passed out
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
You forgot your "boyfriend" from last night on my couch. You're suppose to bring that shit with you.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
How interesting! I'm adding this to my list of things to discuss with you between fucks.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
We drunkenly built a couch fort and fucked in it. I've known her since preschool. This was every childhood fantasy mixed with adult dreams come true.
Randomize
