I'm sitting at the gyno watching cnn in the waiting room
Everyone is walking funny when they come out, ugh I'm not looking forward to this
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Why is your vibrator in the fridge?
I'm testing sex in Alaska before I go there.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
Some lady old enough to be our mom took us home, made me eggs and he still got some. Where do I claim my best wingman/sister trophy?
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
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