She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
I'm approaching homosexuality at an increasingly alarming rate with each break up.
Drank a beer through my butt, how's your initiation going?
I let that bitch know in no uncertain terms I was taking the coke dealer in the breakup
Honestly it's a super power. I can try it a million different ways and nothing happens. Donnie casually says "ok this is now a toppless party" and it all kicks-off
Hey, I left a taco in your dishwasher.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
Randomize
