you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
she told me i tasted like america
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
call me with an emergency in 5 min. This chick has a strap on hangin behind the bathroom door.
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
I'm at a sex party and there's a guy in an ICP jersey and trip pants. I see now that this is the moment in the movie of my life I recognize I have a problem
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
Randomize
