Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
we found you standing over and eating out of my neighbor's garbage can
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
I woke up with flowers, a tiara & pasta salad in my bed. Tequila makes me act like a fat Disney princess
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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